Hurricane Sandy

I wrote this the night of the hurricane. I thought I had lost it but here it is…i was a little bored that night.

Oh Sandy………

Hurricane Sandy came up the East coast this past weekend and decided to make a hard left turn right smack into New Jersey! I would like to thank her for allowing us to have a wonderful night of high winds, heavy rain, power outages, and many pictures online of complete chaos. I saw pictures of down trees, the ocean and bay meeting across islands, boats and houses floating away, and believe it or not sharks swimming down streets. Although the shark pictures could be up for debate it could happen right. I also was able to take a picture of our own personal destruction. A beautiful tree that has been in our yard for 25+years. My mom and dad planted it in front of our house. We had no idea it had gone down until mom looked out the front door. Out of all the trees in our yard we thought this would be the last to go down…boy were we wrong. It will be so odd to look at the house and not see it.

Our power went out earlier today and after a few hours came back on for about an hour or so and went off again. It tried a couple times after that to come back but didn’t work. I would like to thank the electric company for working so hard to restore power. You never realize how important something is to you until it is gone. I would also like to thank all of the emergency response personnel for helping to keep us updated on the storm and evacuations as well as rescuing so many who thought they could wait it out. I don’t know what in the world they were thinking…

I have surprisingly only heard the fire sirens a few times today. I was expecting to hear them more. I hope this means that people were smart enough to stay off the roads although some of the pics on Facebook would tell a different story. But it wasn’t just cars on the roads. I saw a video of someone riding their jetski down a road on LBI I think that’s where. Probably not the smartest thing that person has ever done. Along with videos/pictures of people on the roads their we’re a ton of trees down on houses, cars, and power lines. I have an idea although I can’t take credit for it how hard would it be to think about putting the power lines in the ground and get rid of telephone poles…ok I know I know it probably has been thought about. But in storms like these you wouldn’t have to worry about trees coming down on lines plus there would totally be an advantage to not having telephone poles the stupid and drunk drivers wouldn’t be able to hit them…but that I’m sure would be a huge debate on what would be better.

Now can we take a look at the whole shark swimming down the street thing…WHHAATT! (said how Lo would say it…in complete shock..) That is crazy. I saw two different pictures online. One looks like a shark swimming down the road like he is going to work singing along to the radio. Almost like something you would see everyday going to work. IDK it kinda looks like maybe someone got bored and has the latest photoshop and got a little drunk at the local hurricane party. The second one looks like the shark is just chillin out in someone’s front yard maybe wanting to join in on the local hurricane party maybe waiting for someone to feed him. IDK it seems crazy! I would die. I can tell you two things that come to mind one not that I have ever wanted to walk through a flood but I for damn sure will not now and two if I was thinking to myself I’m not going to evacuate I’ll just ride it out and then saw a shark trying to move to higher ground I would be asking him for a ride too. Crazy stuff going on today.

Today was my Dad’s birthday as well. I know he probably wanted to let us know he was around but this is a bit much. I would of been ok with a little storm but instead we got a crazy hurricane that just won’t give up…

I feel like I have completely gone on and on about the hurricane but it is 11pm here in New Jersey and I am up keeping an eye on our fire and not falling asleep with this crazy wind. I feel torn about waking up in the morning. On one hand the storm will be over but on the other we will be able to see the destruction that Hurricane (enter explicit word here) Sandy has left for us and our neighbors.

My white flag is up and I’m surrendering…TKO GOES TO HURRICANE SANDY…



Holidays…it is amazing how much we can pack into the month between Thanksgiving and Christmas. Between eating your face off, getting a Christmas tree, putting up lights, listening to Christmas music 24/7, and buying presents. You can’t forget about getting together with your families. This year was a little different. I still did all the things above but I also worked at the storm center in Manahawkin which in the beginning of December started to turn into a toy drive. It was a very rewarding opportunity to help so many people with supplies for storm clean up and to make so many Christmas dreams come true for kids.

The day after Thanksgiving Brayleigh’s gravemarker was laid.

It is beautiful.

We went to Smithville to see the light show and have dinner at Fred and Ethels a couple times this season. We saw Santa and he asked Lorelai what he wanted for Christmas. Her response was a bike for my friend Londyn. When asked again her response was a bike for my friend Jackson. Everytime you asked Lorelai what she wanted for Christmas she always said a bike for her friend Londyn. One time she said a gray bone for her dog Wave because he likes gray bones. This girl always amazes me. She has a huge heart. I love her so much.

As I sit here on the couch the night after Christmas I look back on this holiday season in remembrance. Remembrance for those we lost this year and those we have lost in past years.


I am ready for the new year to be here.

Spaghetti Squash…YUMMO!

If you have not tried spaghetti squash…head down to your local produce stand or grocery store and get one.

The easiest way to prepare it is to preheat the oven to 350 degrees. Take your squash and cut the ends off and cut it in half. Clean out the guts/seeds.  Put squash (rind up) on a baking sheet sprayed with a little PAM. Bake for 30-40 minutes or until you can easily stick a knife through the rind.  Once it is cooked using a fork pull the inside of the squash out of the rind…looks like spaghetti. 

There is soo many different ways you can eat it. You can pretty much treat it just like regular spaghetti.  Tonight we had it with chicken and a garlic/honey/soy sauce glaze…

Homemade Christmas Gifts

As christmas approaches, I know it is not even Halloween yet, I have been finding some great homemade gift ideas on Pinterest. I am going to share a few on here. I plan on making a lot of these this year. They are all so cute and great ideas.

First is a glass ornament with a wedding invite in it.  I have already made a few of these and it only takes a few minutes. First you need to go to Michael’s or AC Moore and get glass ornaments.  If you are a teacher go to AC Moore show your teacher ID and get a discount. Take the wedding invite and cut it into strips.  Then take the strips and wrap them around a pen or pencil and put them into the glass ornament. Add a charm to the top and now you have a cute gift idea for the new bride and groom or a christmas gift for their first christmas together!

Second is Hand Painted Linen Towels. I love giving gift baskets as gifts or making them as auction ideas. Here is another great idea.


fabric paint, brushes, painter’s tape, water, drop cloth or craft paper, linen fabric, sewing machine, thread, pair of scissors

Directions :

Begin by cutting the linen into
the size of the item you’d like to make.  For a napkin, a 20-inch square is a standard size, and 24 by 30-inches works great for kitchen towels.

Allow 1-inch extra around the perimeter for the seam.  Place a piece of craft paper on your surface before beginning. Place the linen down and use painter’s tape to create
stripes.  For a ‘plaid’ effect you’ll need to do the perpendicular stripes in separate phases. To make the paint, mix the color you’d like to use, then dilute it with 2 parts water.  Dip your paint brush in the paint, then dab off until almost all of the liquid is off of the brush, leaving only a small amount coating the bristles.  This is called a dry brush method.  Lightly begin to brush the liquid on with even strokes.  Continue until all of the stripes are a homogeneous color and intensity. Remove the tape and repeat to complete your selected pattern.  Let the paint dry for several hours.  Hem the edges of the linens with a 1/2 seam.  Wash in cool water and press.

Capture your Grief in October for Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness

This October for Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness Month, I’m hosting CAPTURE YOUR GRIEF 2012. If you have experienced the death of your baby/ies/child/ren, this project is designed just for you! It doesn’t matter whether you are only a week into this walk or you have been walking this road for 20 years, all are welcome to join in. Capture Your Grief is a 31 day photograph challenge. All you will need is the internet and a camera. It doesn’t have to be some big fancy DSLR – a phone camera or a pocket digital camera will be perfect. And if your camera is broken – you can still take part as in this project you are not required to take a new photo everyday.

I will be posting some of my days on here.

Day 5: memorial. This a garden that was planted this past father’s day. When we lost Brayleigh instead of flowers we asked people to donate to our garden. I used to work at a garden center so they took care of all the arrangements and planted it for us. That day was so emotional for us. This picture shows the love of all the people around us who supported us and continue to do. Thank you to everyone who has donated to make this beautiful garden.

Pink–Beam Me Up

The above link is to a you tube video.  I found this song on one of the support groups I belong to on Facebook. Have you heard a song that really hits on what you are going through or what you are thinking? This song did that for me today. I must of listened to it 20 times.  I love for one minute to be beamed up to hold Brayleigh. To see her eyes. I can only guess they might of been blue like her sister’s were. To have her grab my finger and hold like her sister did. To see her smile like her sister does.  Not only would I love to see Brayleigh, I would love to see my dad, grandmother, and Sean’s nana and pop pop. 
Leave a comment with a song that hits what you have been through or  are going through


a. A fundamental social group in society typically consisting of one or two parents and their children
b. Two or more people who share goals and values, have long-term commitments to one another, and reside usually in the same dwelling place.
Above is the definition of family when you google family.
To me family means so much more than that. Family is the group of people that will stand by your side no matter what the circumstance. Family will go into battle for you even if they don’t know what they are fighting. Your family may be small or it might be big but you know that they will be there for you before you even make the call.
I found all of that to be true when we lost Brayleigh. In a matter of a couple hours my house was full of love and support. I was in a fog. I still thought the dr could be wrong that I would go to the hospital have a c-section and my precious baby would be a healthy and strong little girl. For the next few hours I had my mom, sister, brother, and in laws there with me, my husband, and our daughter Lorelai. We talked about what the doctor said. What we would be doing with Lo. Most importantly we talked about things that hadn’t even dawned on me yet. What would happen with our precious Brayleigh? Would we want to see her, hold her, who would get to see her, did we want Lo to meet her, what she be cremated, would she be put in a casket, should we get pictures, there were soo many options for us to take into consideration. Needless to say I got no sleep that night. But I made it through those first few hours after finding out because of my family.  They are all amazing and strong individuals.